On the Brink of Something Bigger

I'm taking a moment from the frantic whirlwind around me - frantic because I'm leaving for the nation of Haiti in less than 13 hours, and though I should have begun packing roughly three days ago, the first time I even considered what I needed to take was.... about six hours ago.

This being my third trip to this tiny Caribbean country, I think I've got the packing list down, but the mental preparation is a bit more daunting. Here I am, little American girl with suitcase in hand, standing right on the edge of something so much greater than I. I recognize the spectrum of emotions I always feel before this journey. Anticipation, concern, excitement, and a dose of apathy as well. These are the polar opposites of the ones I feel coming back, which range from sorrow and joy to absolute, total disgust.

Why?

Because every time I go I learn to love new souls. Every time God spreads His light a little further into the darkened box of humanity that is the island of Hispaniola. Every time I see just how much I could do without and just how willing I am to do without it if it means just one day longer with these children, these precious, precious children. Because I know that when I leave them, I will inevitably at some point not cry every night for their poor, starving bellies and their empty eyes. And it breaks my heart that every year I would be so able to underestimate the human's ability to forget. And every time I say, "Not this year."

And now I'm saying it again. Not this year. This year I will not forget. This year I will not lose hope. This year I will not ignore the passion within me that says, "Here I am, Lord. Send me!" These people are my heart and soul, they are part of who I am, and I will not abandon that part. These are my starving brothers and sisters, my mother, my father, my family. We speak the same language of Love. We may voice it in different ways, but a hand holding yours never meant anything else.

One week, and then I'll be back. 8 days of sweltering, fiendish heat. 8 days of discomfort and weariness. 8 days in which the supreme love of Jesus Christ conquers all odds, and leaves me remembering that His Gospel has no boundaries, and the same words that changes naive, darkened lives in the poverty-stricken arrondissement of Arcahaie can do the same for the poor, the destitute, and the privileged of the United States of America. There is no higher calling.

Please pray for me and my group as we set out. Pray that the Gospel of Jesus will reach farther than our hands are capable of taking it. Pray that the hearts of Christian and unsaved alike will be prepared as we set out with only the best of our flawed, human intentions. Pray for all of us who dare the undeserved term of Christian. Let His light not go out on our watch.


~Margaret